#geektree [9/4/2001] – Ducky McPothead, DarkZone, Starcraft and Penises, the Purity test, Damien the wannabe Deviant, and obligatory ranting


Well, I was certainly a busy chatter on this day… the log goes on forever… urgh. I started off with the obligatory bitching about Telstra/Dingoblue, which I’ll skip because it’s old now… and then moved on to fighting with Ducky over the DarkZone stuff again. At this point we supposedly had some schematics floating around somewhere, although I’m not sure I ever saw them – from memory they were drawn in Word. πŸ™‚

The fighting was all the usual – me suggesting ideas and Ducky flaming me over them. Very productive environment. πŸ™‚

It’s interesting that we had all figured it would cost about $60 or so max per DarkZone suit… oh how very naive we were. πŸ™‚ I’ve spent about $100 on my room lighting, which now I don’t even have time to do. D’oh. πŸ™‚

Anyway, onwards… there was talk then about Seah’s upcoming party that Friday/Saturday (today’s chat was a Monday). This party was one of the rare ones held at her parent’s other house, which they rented out, and thus was occasionally empty. Fantastic place for a party. This particular party was also the first time Ducky smoked dope. It was absolutely hilarious. Damien, being of course really in with all the underground Mafia types and shit – πŸ˜› – set Ducky up with a friend, who gave him one whole gram for $20. For reasons I won’t disclose here, I felt this was immensely amusing.

So on the night, Ducky rolled a really bad joint, using a whole third or half a gram or somesuch, and then proceeded to get soooo incredibly high. πŸ˜‰ He was actually better when “high”, since he calmed down a lot and wasn’t so annoying. At one point, when he was sitting in one of the back rooms smoking, Gail (Sarah’s mum) dropped by. She was just checking to see that everything was going okay, and dropping food off or somesuch. She also wanted to speak to Ducky – whom she knew was smoking dope – to just warn him not to get caught by the police and get her in trouble. She didn’t care at all that he was doing it. But of course, Ducky was completely paranoid about anyone of his parent’s generation, given what his parents were like on such things… so, naturally, I screwed with his head. Summoning my best “we’re in trouble” face, I walked in and told Ducky very solemnly that Gail wanted to speak with him. He started really freaking out – he thought she was going to go off at him, and he was getting really worked up over it. Eventually, he did go out and see her. She said her little bit, no big deal, and he came back inside. It was immensely amusing. And, because he was soooo stoned, ;), he didn’t crack the shits over it like he normally would have – he actually laughed about it. Man, we should have kept him perpetually high. πŸ™‚

The actual comments on this go something like this:

[6:22] De`Impact: so Ducky, did you talk to seah about what her thing is?
[6:22] Ducky: De`Impact: yea, shes fine, in fact she says its welcome in the house πŸ™‚
[6:23] De`Impact: nice
[6:23] Ducky: she says she was concered about me when she found out
[6:23] Lord-Data: ?
[6:23] Lord-Data: bbiab, food time
[6:23] Ducky: De`Impact: but id rather not, we shoudl go somewhere private

Now I could cut it off here, for immense amusement at the possible euphemisms… just remember that, Damien. πŸ˜›

[6:23] De`Impact: i think she thinks wer'e gunna smoke it and then trash her house.. i dont think she understands what being 'high' is

I think she knew what Ducky was, more to the point…

… and as we’ll soon see, Damien had quite a superiority complex – as I’ve already hinted – with regards to “deviancy”… he was at that stage where he’d done just enough things outside of the mainstream that he thought he was old and wise. Hehe. This is also how Laura sees me at the moment, which is in some ways fair, others not. But more on that latter, perhaps.

And for the record, I too was a little worried about Ducky getting into dope, given his background and all. I could see it become a real crutch for him. But, as far as I know it never did. I think he so over-acted being stoned that he turned himself off it. πŸ™‚

Oh, and Sarah came on briefly to whine about her weight. I’m not really sure why she always did; she wasn’t really the type to seek compensatory attention like that, usually. And you’d think if it really did bother her – which it certainly did while we were going out – she’d shy away from the topic. Hmmm.

Ah, and then there was the purity test. πŸ™‚

Damien was always very proud that he had very low purity test scores. He always went on about this big 500 question test he supposedly did, although I don’t know anyone who ever saw it. One purity test we all did do however was on TheSpark (since removed :,( ). Damien scored 33% on this one. Ducky landed in at 48%, and I scored 58% (apparently down from 84% a few months earlier… blame Sarah πŸ˜› ).

[8:10] Sys: 58% pure.
[8:10] De`Impact: ha
[8:10] De`Impact: actually
[8:10] De`Impact: thats not right
[8:10] De`Impact: you should be ~85%
[8:11] De`Impact: ~90%

Ah, poor poor Damien. He always thought – and still does – that I was oh so pure, prim and proper. Heh. There are just some things he scored very highly on, such as deprived sexual acts :P, which I had and have declined to partake in. Doesn’t mean I haven’t indulged in some of the less deprived ones. πŸ˜‰

[8:19] Ducky: De`Impact: i always get stuck on the meanest word bit, what did you put?
[8:20] De`Impact: worthless

Telling. πŸ™‚

[8:21] Ducky: Have you ever had the kind of sex where you put something in the "out" hole?
[8:21] Ducky: lol
[8:21] Ducky: Have you ever had sex or oral sex in a moving car?
[8:21] Ducky: dammit, it want moving
[8:21] Ducky: wasnt
[8:23] De`Impact: Ducky: dude, i dont wanna know
[8:23] Sys: Doesn't count if it ain't moving. Anyone can do that.
[8:23] De`Impact: having amanda as a gf for 9 mths is an unfair advantage in the purity test. it should be the bonus question

Hehe… very true, very true. πŸ™‚

And again, Ducky and Amanda… well, needless to say Ducky scored very highly in certain areas, the moving car not withstanding. πŸ˜‰

[8:24] Sys: From the sounds of it Amanda was rather plain.
[8:24] De`Impact: amanda swallows
[8:24] Sys: And?
[8:24] De`Impact: nevermind
[8:25] De`Impact: comeback when youve had a bj both ways, and tell me swallowing is the trait of a plain girl
[8:26] Sys: I would have thought swallowing to be a given.
[8:26] De`Impact: Sys: you have no idea. subject closed.
[8:26] Sys: De: If you insist.

Again, this kind of deviant narcissism. Needless to say, I can’t defend my position with proof, since I’m not going to reveal that sort of stuff here, but nonetheless I stand by my opinion. I guess Damien’s just been hanging around the wrong types of guys. πŸ˜›

[8:59] * Lord-Data is 55% pure
[9:00] De`Impact: heh
[9:00] Sys: Only 3% less than me. πŸ™‚
[9:00] Lord-Data: which way is 'better' ?
[9:00] De`Impact: ducky is less pur than the both of yas
[9:00] De`Impact: jon thinks 100%pure is the way, i go for 0%
[9:01] Lord-Data: yes, but ducky is less pure coz he can tick the "has fucked an ugly skank" box
[9:01] Sys: Since going out with Seah I've dropped 30%. πŸ™‚
[9:02] De`Impact: dude, i really really really god damn really really didnt wanna hear that
[9:02] * De`Impact shudders
[9:02] * Sys aims to drop another 30% by Saturday morning. πŸ˜‰
[9:03] ***: De`Impact has quit IRC (No more, god dammit, i dont wanna hear that)

Hehe. True on all counts. πŸ™‚

Although I should reiterate that I liked Amanda, for the most part. She was a bit neurotic, and consequently could be hard to deal with sometimes, but she was okay otherwise.

And to be honest I can’t remember what I was thinking of with that last line… I thought the party was on a Saturday, so perhaps I had something else planned for Friday night. Keep in mind that Sarah and I weren’t going out at this point – I would ask her two days later on Wednesday – and I didn’t plan on asking her out at this point, so… hmm. Nope, no idea. πŸ™‚

I also don’t know why Damien was so freaked out by that… I was of course showboating pure vaporware, since Sarah and I hadn’t even kissed by then, let alone satisfy any of the requirements of your average purity test… but, since he and everyone else really did think Sarah and I were already having wild, animal orgies, I guess his reaction makes some sense.

(and no, we never did have any wild, animal orgies – stop that πŸ˜› )

Also discussed in typical macho fashion was Starcraft, with – as always – Damien and I sparring and comparing sizes. Example:

[8:12] Sys: Cool...I found some Starcraft quotes, from you I /think/.
[8:13] De`Impact: ooo
[8:13] Sys: One's definitely referring to that game you had mercy on me and regretted it, but these others might not be related...
[8:13] De`Impact: my 2 fav topics
[8:13] De`Impact: starcraft and me
[8:13] Sys: "His colonies held me back for an admirable amount of time, but this was a battle of the buldge, and I was a bulgy as they come."
[8:13] Sys: "As my men were bravley raping his hatchery, a feeling welled up inside of me, an emotion I don’t normaly feel. Pity."
[8:13] Sys: "Casualties are invariable in war, but those were two lives that need not have perished on the alter of freedom."
[8:13] Sys: "In my panic I did what all desparate players do. I built everything I could from everywhere I had, in the mad hope it might be enough."

For those interested, the full report in all it’s original glory is available here. As can be seen, back then I had quite a fear and respect for Damien in Starcraft. At the time this was largely well-founded – he was one of if not the best player in our group, and was a very aggressive player, which of course was especially demoralising. In hindsight, the respect but not the fear was warranted. His style of play was predictable and ultimately unsustainable – as evident by the fact that I can now quite easily best him.

Of course, back then I couldn’t even reliably beat the computer… oh my, how embarrassing. I have no such troubles now – in fact, now Starcraft against the computer is just practice for menial tasks – like timing of attacks, and so forth. I played a game earlier today in which I leisurely practised Reaver drops and map superiority… I don’t even have to consider the idea of the computer beating me these days. πŸ™

Oh, and also, for the record, Damien was beaten several times by Ducky. By Ducky.

I’ll just digress partially here, because I feel the need for a rant, and my Ramblings section is already too big. πŸ™‚

[9:10] Lord-Data: you obviously plan to enjoy yourself ;P
[9:11] Sys: Enjoy myself? What, with an iq test? Oh yeah, that's it, "nothing gets me off like knowing how smart I am."

For what it’s worth, yes, I typically score very highly in IQ tests, and have had official ones done before – not just stupid web quizzes, which are sometimes ludicrously inaccurate. But I don’t put much stock in those sort of things. I know plenty of intellectually brilliant people who are still stupid… in my experience and mind, motivation is far more important than ability. Case in point: Laura. Which is of course why I find it so hard to like her; I’ve got no problem with people who aren’t good at what they do, so long as they still try to do it.

“You are not defeated when you lose, you are defeated when you give up.”

Anyway, that’s that out of the way. πŸ™‚

[9:15] De`Impact: yeah right data, with adele for 5 months and your place walking distance from school.. we belive you
[9:16] Sys: πŸ™‚
[9:16] De`Impact: :D~
[9:17] Lord-Data: im serious tho
[9:17] Lord-Data: πŸ™
[9:18] Sys: Ah well, better luck next time.
[9:18] * De`Impact pats Lord-Data on the shoulder, hesitently
[9:19] Lord-Data: <warcraft II Voice> why are you touching me?
[9:19] Lord-Data: netx time. psh. /me throws stones aimlessly
[9:20] Sys: You'll be right.
[9:21] De`Impact: Amanda McShane
[9:21] De`Impact: 9783 2141
[9:21] Lord-Data: fuck off
[9:21] Lord-Data: id fuck bronwyn before id touch amanda
[9:22] Lord-Data: i have a strong dislike for that creature

Hmmm… a lot of people in our group didn’t like Bronwyn very much, which I never understood. I had a hard time relating to her for some reason, but was always nice, and I always liked her more or less. And of course now I’d like to consider myself good friends with her, and I think she’s really cool – she’s one of very few people I know these days (from the old group) who still have their head screwed on straight. Hell, have their head screwed on at all. πŸ™

And yes, that was Amanda’s real number – well, her mum’s place anyway – but I don’t know if it’s still valid. She likes guys with extraordinarily large penises. Personality optional.

Hehe, ;), I’m kidding, mostly. She went out with Ducky, so truly size doesn’t matter. πŸ˜‰

Muahahahaha… apparently I haven’t grown up much since high school. Or primary school for that matter. Ah, the joys of youth. πŸ™‚

Actually, she also went out with Andrew Moore, and I remember her describing his size one day, laughing at how incredibly small he was. I laughed nervously outwards, the whole time thinking from her description that he wasn’t that small at all – relatively speaking, of course. Ee gads, male insecurities are a horrible thing indeed. πŸ™‚

And poor, poor Data. He was very lonely back then. I think I can sympathise more with him now than I could; at the time I still had that youthful optimism that curtailed thoughts of loneliness. No more, sadly. πŸ™‚ At least he’s got Lauren now, and they’ve been together for so many years now, something must be going right. πŸ™‚

I wonder if I should compile a list of the longest relationships in our group? Just more penis envy, perhaps. πŸ™‚ When Sarah ended it with Brian, he asked her to keep going out with him for a few more days, so that they could reach one year. When she left me, I almost asked the same for our three year, just to annoy her. Well, also because I still thought we were actually trying to stay together, and didn’t want to ruin a perfectly good three year anniversary over what I thought were significant but not insurmountable issues… I didn’t end up asking her specifically because of what had happened with her and Brian previously… I should have; it couldn’t have made things any worse, obviously. Ah well, shit happens. πŸ™‚

And that’s about it for this log… there’s some private chat with Adele at the end, mostly just talking about her not having a social life ’cause of work.. that excuse started in about year 11 for some people, and like a plague has since spread to just about everyone. Real life sucks. πŸ™


And there was something there I wasn’t meant to tell Ducky, but I can’t for the life of me figure out what.. apparently I’m no longer fluent in irc-speak. I guess that makes it easy for me not to tell him. πŸ™‚

I think that’ll do it for now. I’m going to have to speed all this up – we really were quite a boring bunch back then. πŸ™‚

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